Sticking with the car theme, here’s the latest advert from Vauxhall for their Corsa:

Every time I see one of these adverts I think to myself: “God, I’m so not in the demographic they’re targeting here”. There’s a couple of reasons for this thought:

Firstly, whenever I hear Sean Paul singing, regardless of the words, all I hear is “Mr Lover, Lover. Hmmmm”. Yes, to me at least, Sean Paul is the current Shaggy. And that’s not a good thing, kids.

Secondly, the adverts feature a fictional *band* of puppets (NB: I don’t think the word ‘fictional’ was strictly necessary there but I added it for complete clarity) called the C’Mons. But unless they is Muppets, puppets is whack.

In my vain attempts to get into the mind set of the target demograph, I think these words:”So you’re doing a little puppetry, huh? That’s whack! Puppetry is whack! ‘Sup with the whack puppetry, ‘sup?! Huh? Come on, am I 19 or what?!”.

So anyway, as I was saying, I normally dismiss these adverts as “not really aimed at me” and “I’m too old for this shit“.

But in the latest advert Vauxhall have decided to push the boundaries of decency in so many ways….

One of the C’Mons (the Red one) has hired a prostitute for the *band* to enjoy. While he’s showering himself down after the event, the prostitute decides that the 20 quid she got for doing the dirty with a *band* of puppets wasn’t enough, so she steals the *bands* Corsa as a tip.

This goes down particularly badly with the Red puppet who has to wake the rest of the *band* enjoying a post-orgy nap (in the same bed) to chase after the prostitute. Each of the puppets tries to stop her but alas they all fail (they are just puppets after all). It’s only the Red one that succeeds. He runs out in front of the car, flags it down only for his towel to drop off him and his little puppet-penis (or the button or sequin or whatever is sown on there) to be revealed to the escort girl. He leaves her at the road side ruing the day she agreed to sleep with 5 puppets.

So that’s:

• Prostitution
• Human/Puppet Sex
• Puppet Orgy
• Puppet Nudity

Quite a lot of puppet based filth to cram into one advert.

But then, what the hell do I care? This adverts not aimed at me anyways.

Plus, this advert is whack!

Thanks to Wodge for submitting this bad ad.