The Skills Centre - Tony?

23 October 2008 by Silky

Is your name “Lehman”?

Have you and your brother just found yourselves out of a job?

If you’ve answered yes to either of the questions above, then read on, I might be able to help you.

Because, assuming you haven’t just thrown yourself out of your 32nd floor office window, now is the ideal time to retrain as a plumber, electrician, joiner or professional tea drinker.

And thanks to a very well timed advert, it seems that The Skills Centre is the ideal place to do that training. But just in case you missed The Skills Centre’s “inspirational” advert, here’s Simon Breadbin’s recap for you:

“Tony! How are things?

Let’s have an impossibly stilted exchange about what’s happened in the three years since we did our generic ‘work’ at ‘The Site’.

I’ve being doing ‘a course’ and got ‘my certificate’; yes, working AND learning.

Look at my smug van and tidy beard. Hark as I drop not a single aitch whilst whining my way through a script that makes Elton Johns hair look natural.

I’m better than you now Tony; you’re shit, and I’m ace.

Ha ha! Your life is ashes, YOUR LIFE IS ASHES…”

Nice one, Simon!

Judge for yourself.

Just How Bad is this Ad?

1 TWA Exclamation!2 TWA Exclamations!3 TWA Exclamations!4 TWA Exclamations!5 TWA Exclamations! 38 Votes
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13Responses:

  • Said on the 23 October 2008

    Smug gurning idiots. What a pity that Tony hadn’t got the skills with a spanner to smash red-jumper man’s new van up…..tossers.

    I hate all these conversational type adverts. Don’t get me started on a couple of corkers on the radio at the moment……grrrrr!

  • Said on the 23 October 2008

    Yeah, Helsie, if only Tony weren’t such a loser….

    Something I missed before by now particularly like the way Tony implies that since he went to the Skill Centre he’s been getting more sex of his now pregnant missus.

    Magical what those certificates can do for you.

  • Said on the 3 November 2008

    Skills centre,what a load of old cobblers!There aint no way i would employed somebody from a place like this.to be skilled you must have done an apprenticeship.get knotted you smug twit.

  • Said on the 24 November 2008

    Its actually “earning and learning” Im sure they thought that was an amazing tagline, probably thought up by the owners not the advert makers.

    Another great thing about it is the terrible dubbing, its blatently not those guys voices. Perhaps they were too rough, the voices are like some sort of 20 year old optimistic gimp.

    Im sure the skills centre offers up totally not recognisable qualifications for money.

    You have to earn and learn to pay for the terrible certificate i guess

  • Said on the 1 December 2008

    Hang… aren’t the two men being dubbed by the SAME PERSON, speaking slightly higher or lower?

    Is anyone else catching this?

  • Said on the 4 December 2008

    I have just seen this advert again, and felt the need to do something about it. So I have gone to all the effort of turning on my computer, discovering this site and writing a comment, just so I can get the hate off my chest…

    This advert is AWFUL - horrible script, horrible dubbing, horrible horrible horrible. Please please let this get to the No 1 spot!!!

    I mean who names their own company ‘Gary Electrics’ anyway (as seen on the side of his “nice wheels!”) Nice wheels, really….are you sure - it’s a black van. The only cool black van there has ever been and ever will be belonged to the A-Team, not Gary who did an electrics course at the skills centre. AAAAGGGHHH!!

    Ok, think I’m better now. Thanks.

  • Said on the 12 December 2008

    The thing I really relate to is the point / wave of the hand at his mate as he drives off!! I don’t know about anyone else but i do this all the time and my mates think i’m awesome for doing it!

  • Said on the 13 December 2008

    They ought to make a new one set in a public toilet. Gary meets Tony standing at a urinal.
    “Must be 3 years since we scrubbed toilets together…”
    Gary then goes on to tell of his Skills Centre certificate in toilet maintenance…
    Gary lets one off…
    “Doing a piss AND farting at the same time?!?!”

  • Said on the 16 December 2008

    Do these comedians really think by watching an advert which probably cost 8 pence to make will make anyone want to train with them.
    I also found a site you can also find them on Google “the skills centre on the ferret”

    Happy viewing……………..Bunch of cowboys

  • Said on the 16 December 2008

    Note from Silky: After the great Gadget Helpline fiasco earlier this year, I’ve edited this comment to remove comments about the Skills Centre. Sorry.

    As for the advert, Gary needs more rigidity in his point while he’s fucking off in his “nice wheels” with his Mrs beside him, who I might add, would pay to screw. I don’t know why but I’ve got a thing about pregnant women these days. Must be the mothering tits.

    All The Skills Centre is is a sales company. <Content Edited By Silky>. Type in IT Skills digital trends on Google.(IT skills is one of their old products). Makes for some fucking good reading……

  • Said on the 16 December 2008

    Nice post by Sy, slightly rude however amusing, By the way i did check out The Skills Centre on Digital Trends under The title forum. Naughty boys eh ?

  • Said on the 20 December 2008

    The thing i find amusing is the fact that Gary feels the need to write “Skills Centre” down on a card to give to tony. does he really feel its necessary to write 2 words down on a card so “Tony” won’t forget…

  • Said on the 20 December 2008

    Another thing I have noticed is that Tony seems really awkward, embarrassed, or afraid of Gary… like Gary’s gonna kill him if he says the wrong word or something! Also, you’d have thought Tony’s “friend” Gary could have told him about his “earning and learning” at the time. Tony must feel really betrayed. Cheeky bastard…

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