Stella Artois – Smooth Outcome
19 March 2009 by SilkyIf you thought TV’s Worst Adverts was overly picky when it came to criticising adverts check out this this complaint to the ASA.
Apparently, amongst other things, Alcohol Concern were *concerned* that the advert for the *alcoholic* Stella Artois 4% lager drink featuring a man rubbing suncream into a woman’s shoulders “linked alcohol to sexual success”.
What a sad indictment of a pathetic life thinking “rubbing a woman’s shoulders counts as sexual success” really is.
Anyways, the good news for all 40 year old virgins still living with their mums is that the ASA didn’t uphold the complaint – so there’ll still be plenty more shoulder rubbing action for them to fire their yogurt cannons to in the future.
23Responses:
Lily
Said on the 19 March 2009
Alcohol concern? What concerns me is it tastes like shit. That’s a far more serious issue.
Pavlov's Cat
Said on the 19 March 2009
Check out Alcohol Concern at FakeCharities.org
http://fakecharities.org/pages/posts/alcohol-concern3.php
Your taxes paid for this complaint, Whether you wanted to make it or not.
Duncan
Said on the 19 March 2009
The thing that gets me about this awful advert is how does he get into the womens shoes, and why does he say “Un Stella Artois four s’il vous plait” instead of “stella artois quatre”?
MacPedro
Said on the 20 March 2009
Or indeed, why didn’t he ask for “Un batteur de femme”?
Simon Breadbin
Said on the 20 March 2009
Of course alchohol is linked to sexual success. If I can successfully get my girlfriend pissed, I can successfully get sucked off.
Lily
Said on the 20 March 2009
No offence Simon Breadbin but you must be especially gross if you have to get your girl drunk before she sucks you off. Either that or she’s a member of the WI.
Zapp
Said on the 20 March 2009
The thing that gets me about this awful advert is how does he get into the womens shoes, and why does he say “Un Stella Artois four s’il vous plait” instead of “stella artois quatre”?
Hmmm myabe its because he actually said pour instead of four
Simon Breadbin
Said on the 20 March 2009
That was kinda the whole joke Lily.
I’m lush really.
Goit
Said on the 21 March 2009
After falling over the side of what looked like a 200m drop… and the ‘villain’ sprints down the stairs to further lay the smack down! Now that leads to an interesting quandry, he was either going to stamp on the squelchy goo of what was left of our ‘hero’ or the guy actually survived and therefore is as powerful as superman and would have crushed the ‘villain’s head like a grape between his fingertips.
Come to think of it, that’s what I’d like to do to the makers of this utter shíte advert.
CovertJellyfish
Said on the 22 March 2009
I think she should be fauthful to that fat guy, I mean the one wuith the poncey haircut wears womanes shoes, and the other guy can run dow 5/6 flights of stairs and still be ready to rumble, shows that he can finish what he starts, not like the tosser on watered down wife beater who’d probably give a few token thrusts before rolling over in a drunken stupor, fart and then pass out…
Not that It’s not attractive when I do that….
Duncan
Said on the 24 March 2009
Zapp,
he doesn’t say pour, he says four.
Angel Eyes
Said on the 28 March 2009
“Zapp,
he doesn’t say pour, he says four”
Actually, it’s “forte”, meaning strong…
I don’t understand why the old guy chases him after he has pushed him off a cliff…surely you would assume he is dead??
will
Said on the 25 May 2009
no its ‘four’! its not ‘forte’ because its not strong
she says it again at the end ‘stella artois 4′ its because its french beer and english marketing, quite simple really
CovertJellyfish
Said on the 26 May 2009
Hang On a fucking minute!! Stella is Belgian!! So if I have this right, they are using Italian words to Sell Belgian Beer to English Idiots who think it’s FRENCH!!
Lucy
Said on the 22 June 2009
So the official languages of Belgium aren’t Dutch, French and German? Talk about idiots…
CovertJellyfish
Said on the 22 June 2009
Yep, it seems like we attract them….
R E Krishna
Said on the 23 June 2009
And there was me thinking that the official languages of Belgium are French and Flemish.
CovertJellyfish
Said on the 23 June 2009
Isn’t that like Welsh but a bit more gooey?
R E Krishna
Said on the 24 June 2009
I can only deduce that Flemish gets its name from the huge amount of saliva that collects in the throat if you try to speak it.
CovertJellyfish
Said on the 24 June 2009
Exactly like Welsh then, I once asked for directions in Wales *shudder* I never travel without a pac a mac now….
R E Krishna
Said on the 25 June 2009
Very wise….. also see ebay for details on a folding, easily portable, spittoon.
Quality guaranteed, fully authorized by the Flemish (AKA Welsh) tourist board. Incidentally while travelling in Wales be very sure not to inadvertantly abscond with some of their mud on your shoes. Apparently “it’s good mud and you’re not having it”.
Brought to you by “Cerebral Posts R Us”
CovertJellyfish
Said on the 25 June 2009
Fuck em, they’re cunts anyway.
Sponsored by Cupid Stunt
tony
Said on the 20 September 2009
“forte” is French as well as Italian – it means strong. and if he’d said fotre he would have pronounced the “t”. The beer is called 4 because they watered it down to 4% for the British market