Back in the middle ages people more than likely had bad teeth. I say “more than likely” because, as usual, I’ve done no research into the facts behind this post.

These bad teeth saw the rise of such nicknames as “Gummy Fletcher” and “Toothless Jim” and popular phrases such as “She’s got a gap in her teeth bigger than the Dartford tunnel” etcetera, etcetera.

Fortunately, now that we don’t live in the middle ages, our oral hygiene is much improved, and we very rarely meet people called “Gummy”.

This is, in no small part, thanks to the dental know-how of the Oral B experts - who seem to loiter disturbingly in our bathroom cabinets.

Yeah, after many, many years research (or at least more than I do for these posts) they’ve finally worked out how long you should brush your teeth to get them perfectly clean.

Turns out it’s 2 minutes.

Conveniently, that’s 30 seconds for each “quadrant” of your mouth.

What were the chances - 2 minutes dead? But we’d better not argue with the experts.

They’ve also come up with the life saving Smart Guide that has special sensors which let you know if you’re brushing too hard. This is going to be a God-send to millions of people like me, who are forever brushing their teeth so hard that they snap the heads clean off!

I must get through about 30 tooth brushes a week at the moment.

Although, I sometimes like to use the special sensors I have built into my teeth and gums to let me know if I’m brushing to hard - called “nerves”.

As a rule of thumb, here’s how my oral nerves give me feedback:

• Gum are sore = Brushing too hard.
• Gums are not sore = Brushing just fine.

Fairly straight forward but I wouldn’t listen to me; I’m no expert (nor do I live in your bathroom cabinet).

Judge for yourself.