Oasis – The Cactus Kid – Pregnant
11 July 2008 by SilkyAs a parent you always try to do the best by your children:
- You make sure they’ve got shoes on their feet.
- You make sure they know the facts of life.
- You make sure they don’t date flora.
The mother in the new Oasis advert appears to have failed her daughter on all three of these points.
Because not only is the poor (and seemingly only 14 years old) girl up the duff, she’s in that state thanks to a man who’s half cactus. And what’s more, she seems to have burnt the soles of her feet during the whole “having sex with a man who looks like he has a very prickly penis” affair.
She does look to have recovered from the coitus fairly well though because one would imagine that ramming a cactus up your vagina and having sun burnt feet would make you walk like John Wayne giving Fern Britton a piggy-back.
Spare a thought for the old Cactus Kid though, will you?
He can’t have had much luck with the ladies growing up covered in spines. Finally finding a consenting partner (lets not even go down the possible cactus man on under-age girl rape route) must have been like all his Christmases coming at once.
Although I can think of one positive of being a cactus man – no post coital snuggling. As the women hobbles off to casualty, you just roll over and drift happily off to sleep.
What bliss.
But just as the mother in this advert has failed her daughter so it seems the ad-makers have failed their botany exams.
For the only explanation (that come within a couple of thousand light years of being logical) for the Cactus Kid to actually be half cactus is to tie in with the tag line “For people who don’t like water”. Except cactuses don’t don’t like water, it’s just they can grow in a dry environment. It’s clearly not the same thing.
God, I bet they feel foolish now I’ve pointed out that flaw in their lunacy.
Anyway while you wait for the final part of this series in which the pain of child birth is compounded by the fact the baby is covered in prickles, here’s the madness of the first part to enjoy:
Just How Bad is this Ad?
(42 votes, average: 4.43 out of 5)
22Responses:
Dave
Said on the 12 July 2008
Is this a spoof? If it isn’t there are some very disturbed people in advertising.
Hannah
Said on the 12 July 2008
Only a few hours ago I watched this and questioned why it’s still being shown and yet the Heinz ad was pulled! Surely the content of this ad is damaging on more levels than that of two men having a kiss?! I like the way it’s shot though…
David Parry
Said on the 12 July 2008
Take a look at Terrence Malick’s brilliant first film Badlands starring Sissy Spacek and Martin Sheen if you want to know where the spoof comes from. A cult classic from 1973.
Silky
Said on the 13 July 2008
Have you seen the film with Martin Sheen’s brother, Barry, in it called Brooklands? Now that’s a classic.
What a lovely film to spoof for a soft drink advert.
Woody
Said on the 13 July 2008
I think this is one of the best adverts on TV at the moment. What a classic! Can´t wait for the other instalments.
Crimewave
Said on the 13 July 2008
Possibly drugs were involved in the process of this ad. Many companies seem to be going with the “wtf” aspect these days
Crimewave
Said on the 13 July 2008
Oh okay didnt read the above comments. I doubt all of the public is going to get the reference to a film from ’73. Just saying.
Silky
Said on the 14 July 2008
Here’s the official line on the inspiration for the advert from the Coca-Cola Great Britain Web site:
“Shot in Mexico in the style of a classic American road movie, the TV ads are reminiscent of films including Rebel Without a Cause, True Romance, Bad Lands and Thelma & Louise.”
It doesn’t mention Brooklands though. Strange.
Paris
Said on the 18 July 2008
i dont understand the sunburned feet part
can someone explain?
Crimewave
Said on the 18 July 2008
I think its cos she has her legs in the air all the time?? If she is knocked up…
Dirty bitch!!
Bex
Said on the 23 July 2008
I don’t understand how they can say that Oasis can replace water..thats like saying, if you don’t like fruit, have a Cadbury’s fruit and nut bar! Saying that, I do drink Oasis and I’m not mad on water…
Cathryn
Said on the 12 August 2008
right i don’t get it! one why is he ”The Cactus Kid”?
and ehy does she always have sun burn on her feet?
peopleeee explain!
mind i do love oasis
tigerstail
Said on the 23 August 2008
Badlands homage apart,isn’t statutory rape an issue here.
Paedo prick (pun intended)
Bookmarks about Botany
Said on the 25 August 2008
[...] – bookmarked by 3 members originally found by alexandrastcharles on 2008-08-08 Oasis – The Cactus Kid – Pregnant http://tvs-worst-adverts.co.uk/oasis-the-cactus-kid-pregnant/ – bookmarked by 5 members originally [...]
Cath
Said on the 8 October 2008
This ad has now been banned by the ASA after people complained about it being offensive and irresponsible. It seems we now won’t get to see the girl give birth to a cactus!
lethe
Said on the 10 October 2008
damn.
I particularly love Coke’s line: “Cactus Kids preference for Oasis was not because he disliked water but because he preferred a fruity taste…”
http://www.asa.org.uk/asa/adjudications/Public/TF_ADJ_45117.htm
Stan
Said on the 6 January 2009
eee
this is why this ad got banned
ppl taking it too seriously. Its a shame as its actually creative unlike most budgeted ads thesedays.
the actress was 22, not so underage.
it wasnt advertising it as better than water, just as an alternative… like many other drinks who failed to sell themselves on what retrospectively is quite an obvious bonus. nice insight i think.
Jay
Said on the 19 January 2009
I think the mother & daughter had a thorny past and the father left because he was a spineless prick.
No but seriously, at least he doesn’t have those fine hair spines, they’re a bitch to get out.
Samaira Shah
Said on the 21 January 2009
I don’t understand how the soles of her feet got sunburned, though I’m sure she has nice feet.
Hazel
Said on the 29 April 2009
To me this advert seemed like a spoof of a film I saw called ‘Where the Heart Is’ about a pregnant teenager on the run who gets abandoned by her boyfriend and gives birth to her baby in Wal-mart.
Ugh
Said on the 23 November 2010
Can someone tell me how the child was created and …why she is still alive?
flood damage alhambra
Said on the 6 January 2011
I’d like to say for which you always provide clear information and as well as an avid reader of your site for quite some time. Just wanted to thank you really for all the excellent work you do!