Picture Loans - Dad’s Found Your Scooter

22 July 2007 by Silky

I can say 3 words in a Geordie accent:

Cake
Photocopier
Conjunctivitis

Genuinely that’s it. But that’s still makes me better at Geordie accents than the women from the Picture Loans advert:

She should have her Equity card taken off her, torn into a thousand pieces and thrown into the Tyne. Disgraceful.

Anyways, I’ve mentioned before that I think adverts for loans companies are like the psychics of the money world. Extorting money from the most vulnerable and needy.

This Picture Loans ad is slightly different though, it has a slightly different tone. They’re trying to make out that ringing up to arrange a loan is no bigger a deal than chatting to a close friend.

“I’m on the phone to Picture!” - the women snaps when her idiot husband dares to ask her a question.

“Sorry” - he mouths as if she’s talking to the Queen and it turns out the Queen is her mum.

“Don’t worry, it’s always like this here… Yeah, my fucking husband is always talking to me, the cunt” - You may not have noticed but I’ve subtly added in words what was previously only implied to that last sentence.

But it is this tone, that arranging a loan is such an off the cuff thing, no big deal, like calling a mate that makes this advert so completely unscrupulous.

If, like the woman in the add, you borrow Â£25,000 (”25″ she mouths to her husband as if they haven’t really spoken about this before because why would they) from Picture and pay it back over 180 months it will cost you nearly Â£45,000. Plus, it’s secured against your house, if you default on your loan, you lose your house.

And no matter how friendly Picture might want to portray themselves, if you don’t pay your loan back, they will fuck you royally:

“Josh, how many more times? Dad’s taken your scoota and all your other toys down to Cash Converters to pay back the Â£45 grand we owe Picture.”

Getting a loan of of Â£25,000 is an absolutely massive deal; not something you casually do in between Cash in the Attic and Doctors. Maybe if we all lived within our means a bit more we wouldn’t have to consolidate in the first place. But then what would be on the TV in between the programmes?

Ah, fuck it, do what you want.

I’m off to eat some cake then photocopy my conjunctivitis.

This Bad Ad was submitted by Mike Empuria. Cheers, Mike.

Update

Well it looks like TWA aren’t the only ones who think this advert makes taking a loan seem too light-hearted an affair. The Advertising Standards Authority has banned this from being shown again on TV (thanks for the link, Dave).

Of course, you can still watch it hear on TVs Worst Adverts (until it’s taken off YouTube that is…).

Just How Bad is this Ad?

162 Votes

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36Responses:

Steve

Said on the 3 August 2007

The woman mentions 25 grand as if it’s 100 quid. She says “that’s a lot less than we’re paying at the moment”, implying that Picture Loan’s interest rates are reasonable. But looking at the firm’s rates, you wonder who the ‘Geordie lass’ is currently in debt to - some loan shark who employs former heavyweight boxers to collect his cash?
karl booth

Said on the 11 August 2007

Its like the previous advert “well they better not cancel the football” who you talking to? she asks foolishly not knowing.Its Mike at his picture loan! how much do we want to borrow 25 grand? As though its nothing meanwhile shes videoing it on a video camera probaly one the reasons why the got so badly into debt, videoing it like some great proud family event. Hope the baliffs will be round soon.
Alan

Said on the 16 August 2007

I don’t know why everyone is having a go at Picture. They are a great company, in fact I just heard that the Dad in the advert just tripped over Joshs’ scoota. He has a broken neck and will never work again. Just as you would expect, Picture stepped in and topped up her loan to 100 grand to see her through. How thoughtful is that ?
tommy

Said on the 1 September 2007

Hate this advert as i have dealings with picture loan. (5 interest payment hikes in 8 months) Stay away from them guys honestly. By the way Josh , dad has sold your fuckin scoota to make ends meet and hes not there discussing loan with wife on phone cos hes looking for some rope and hes going up the attic with it.
russell

Said on the 30 September 2007

All true… but she is a bit of a fox; I’d lend her mine
Steve

Said on the 30 September 2007

In response to Russell, we’re debating the rights and wrongs of a loan company’s marketing strategy here mister, not commenting on the attractiveness of the female in the advert. Although since you mention it, she isn’t bad and you can get behind me in the queue.
lol

Said on the 11 October 2007

I just hate for hate’s sake! soon criminals lower down the food chain will also be advertising that all you have to do to get fleeced is to phone up and arrange a time and place.
Jen

Said on the 12 October 2007

It’s been taken off air! Officially! As it makes calling for a loan something that’s so easy to do that you don’t even need to think about it…or something.
Dave

Said on the 25 October 2007

Link to article:

http://www.thisismoney.co.uk/credit-and-loans/article.html?in_article_id=425172&in_page_id=9

Finally, hopefully all the other loan ads will be banned too >_> someday..
dave

Said on the 26 October 2007

ssssh i am on the phone to picture. i ,love the thumbs up he gives her when shes sorting it out like theyve just sold their house for a massive profit .it just makes me want to shout JAAACK DADS FOUND YAH SKOOOOODER YOU FUKKIN MUG
Stephen Heliczer

Said on the 13 November 2007

What a brilliant report on a shocking advertisment. Fantastic, and v funny too.
Sue

Said on the 29 November 2007

Also why is the kids have southern accents?
silas crippledick

Said on the 4 December 2007

Does anyone have a lnk to the first advert? (an adult conversation)
I’d love to do a mix of it. Which i’ll gladly post up, once completed.
silas crippledick

Said on the 4 December 2007

Doesn’t matter…i’ve found it.
anonymous

Said on the 6 December 2007

I HATE HER, DADS FOUND YER SCOO’ER!!!! she’ll talk 2 er son, but if her husband tries to talk he’ll get a rite mouth-full that she’s on the phone!!!

I HATE PICTURE ADVERTS
Muster

Said on the 9 January 2008

I enjoyed this advert: how?; by shout “it’s are your arse” as a reply to each question “where my/the……..”, “it’s up your arse”. Fitted every time - then I graduated to silently looking at my partner at each key phrase and then to a sort of graphic sign language. Keep us amused for a very long time did that little advertising gem.
Soapy

Said on the 10 January 2008

I can understand the medium, i mean everyone wants video footage of the most important times in their life, so it’s a natural conclusion that you’d want a record of the moment your finances became so perilous that you’d be prepared to hop in bed with Picture. The tone is something else though. That silent mouthing of ‘25 Thousand’ sets me off into ‘one eye twitch’ mode every time. Part of me even hopes that the noise at the end is not Dad ‘finding the scooter’ but rather dads means of staying airbourne long enough to tighten the noose falling away, leaving him silentyl twitching while his ignorant wife silently mouths ‘Shall i call the doctor?’
Jen

Said on the 17 January 2008

Why do people keep voting for this one? I believe it is a total pain in the arse, but surely the slim fast one should be at the top!
Jellyfish McSaveloy

Said on the 31 January 2008

STOP SPENDING MONEY YOU DON’T HAVE YOU THICK CUNTS.

Job done, Picture can fuck off.
SuperFurrySeahawk

Said on the 12 February 2008

This little gem spoofing this ad that I found on YouTube is closer to the truth than the original ad ever was…!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GGrPwmDECEg
Dave

Said on the 12 February 2008

That is the best spoof I have ever seen since the cillit bang & esure remixes.
Emile

Said on the 5 March 2008

Dear Josh
Since your father tripped over your scooooota and broke his bleeding neck i can longer afford to repay the 25 grand we owe thus iam now on the game and iam selling my used underwear on ebay.As i write this my latest punter who funnlly enough works for picture in the over due accounts department is upstairs strapped to your scoooota awaiting his punishment.
I know that i have not been a good mother and when the next loan clears in the bank i will buy back your kidney and i will see if the childrens home in jersey will send you home.
As ever your loving geordie Mother xx
Picture The Loan Banned Â» Television Adverts at Duncan’s TV Ad Land

Said on the 16 March 2008

[...] from family members. The advert has been banned by the Advertising Standards Authority, appeared on TV’s Worst Adverts blog, inspired numerous YouTube spoofs and led to the formation of a group on Facebook (Hate the Picture [...]
kris

Said on the 25 March 2008

“don’t worry, it’s always like this here, but at least i can get me credit sorted!!”
i’m sure the drug dealing mob boss on the other end of the phone was really concerned. look at the repayments, borrow Â£25,000, pay back Â£43,358. how the hell can paying back nearly Â£20,000 be an acceptable payment plan, and would they not have sorted how much they wanted to borrow before she rang them?? the music drive me crazy also. light hearted, hey lets get in debt for the rest of our lives!!!!!

i hate her so much!!!!!!!
the guy from the first advert too.
Dave

Said on the 26 March 2008

Good that its been banned, it’s about time the ASA got a grip on this sort of shite. Borrowing this amount of cash should never be portrayed as being as easy as ordering a fucking pizza
Marsten

Said on the 3 April 2008

It’s been taken off youtube
Silky

Said on the 3 April 2008

Thanks Marsten, I’ve updated the link to a worse quality one…
jay

Said on the 14 April 2008

Afraid this loan bit is sore point with me but I work in Theatre and I’ll bet none of them have an equity card ! Hilarious blog. the kid is clever too , manages to nip from garden into bedroom, unless they have two, or hes just clever and can throw his voice. Hope they got health insurance cos Dads just brocken his leg on scooter.
And I’m sure she swears at poor Josh at the window. Ah well, happy families(-:
Matt Beeching

Said on the 1 May 2008

Though the question on everyones mind is: Where is this woman now?
I’m almost certain she is has been relocated under a government protection plan.
billcarr178

Said on the 1 May 2008

To quote Charlie Brooker - ‘Picture the prick, actually you don’t have to, here he is!’
arsemole

Said on the 17 May 2008

Scooooota my arse more like a fucking northern fat twat bastard mind you all fucking northeners are thick….as thick as shit……they should wipe out the northern counties and line the fuckers up against a big fucking wall and shot the fucking lot…there fucking accents get on my tits….and as for the fucking scottish cunts weel themm cunts to should be wiped from the face of the planet what a bunch of homos in there skirts tossing there cabers…sounds a bit poofy to me…the south shall rise again….
hazel

Said on the 17 June 2008

Guess what, Dad?

Josh isn’t your real son. Infact, ‘Mam’ is sleeping with the guy from picture, and the money will go towards their elopement.

Nae luck Dad.

Also, the scooota is hollow, as Josh uses it to stash his heroin.

Perhaps the biggest lie in this ad is that British kids do exercise.

And arsemole, no need for racism, eh?? Caber tossing is shithot
Paul

Said on the 12 July 2008

In response to aresemole - I think you’ll find that tossing a caber isn’t gay in the slightest - where as morris dancing is the most gay & retarded thing i have ever seen - so shut up you soft southern twat.
Christine

Said on the 14 August 2008

I HATE this add. It’s so fake and insulting and if I were in that house the scooter would be found rammed up the Dad’s ar$e. Sideways.
Anchor the Wanchor

Said on the 16 August 2008

Why does she cover the mouthpiece to stop Mr Loan Shark listening, and then mouth ‘25′ in silence anyway?! Silly cow.
Picture The Loan Banned | The Inspiration Room Daily

Said on the 5 October 2008

[...] from family members. The advert has been banned by the Advertising Standards Authority, appeared on TV’s Worst Adverts blog, inspired numerous YouTube spoofs and led to the formation of a group on Facebook (Hate the Picture [...]